Saturday, February 9, 2013

WHEN NATURE CALLS -- SEND A TEXT MESSAGE?


When nature calls at either door
do not intend to bluff her
but haste away
night or day
or health is sure to suffer.

The old saying puts an emphasis on speed, but inventive Swedes don't want you to hurry quite so fast.

The company Jernhusen, that manages Swedish railway stations, have long been fed up with vandalized coin-operated toilets. They have introduced new locks on public toilets that slow you down considerably, or don't let you in at all. In order to get into the toilet, you have to pay via your mobile phone. You pay by  sending a (SMS) text-message which debits your phone bill and then, click, the toilet door opens for you. 

But what if you do not have a mobile phone, and what if you cannot read the instructions, or what if your battery is low or out? Or if you just can't wait another second? Imagining having the runnies, what better  thing  could you wish for than having to read the instructions on the toilet door and fiddle with your phone. And wait for the door to open up. Then good luck to you! Be sure to have a very strong sphincter muscle. Or health is sure to suffer.

Maybe this idiotic and dangerous system opens up new business opportunities reminiscent of what existed in London around 1700 when there were no sewers and there were entrepreneurs such as the "human lavatory" who provided toilet services for the well-to-do. A man with a big cape and a bucket would offer you to sit on the bucket (in the street) and do your business in the street whilst covered with his cape. Charming!
(From LIVES AND TIMES OF THE GREAT COMPOSERS by Michael Steen.)

Count yourself lucky to find a coin operated toilet.